meditating more

People tell me all the time about their wish to meditate more. When I ask them why they don't, they don't really know. The only thing they are aware of is that periodically they try to build up a meditation practice, and for some reason it doesn't stick.

I hear this kind of thing often enough that I think it must be pretty common. I also know from my own practice that sticking to meditation on a regular basis can be a big challenge, especially during the periods when we need it the most, and therefore avoid it.

I can think of several times when the last thing I wanted to do was meditate, precisely because it was what I needed most. I was too wound up inside. Sitting still was very painful. It brought stress and emotion to the surface immediately, and I bolted.

In fact, I bolted a moment ago. I wrote the word bolted and flew out the door! I was halfway around the block before I realized what was happening. My writing process was creating the right content for the rest of this inquiry, using me as a prop.

What matters is that I returned, the same thing that matters when you want to meditate more. It's not about the fact that you didn't manage to. You have to let that go. It's about coming back over and over again, and resuming your routine with dignity.

Whenever you do, you deepen your understanding of why practices challenge us. It's one of their functions, and we're lucky to have it. We sit with our pain and complaints and distortions, and learn to free ourselves from them by enduring the storms.